I do it too. I hold on to clients I know I need to let go of, I want things to work, when I know they just won't. I constantly have to check myself and re-discover what it means to embrace change.
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In the tv show babylon 5 there was a race of alians who believed that conflict was the key to change. They believed that only through creating conflict did history advance. I believe there's some truth to that. The more I see the situation in the middle east the more I believe before 911 that it was in a state of false conflict. Ruling parties with ideals and mindsets based in the logic of the middle ages force or convince their children into subjegating their lives for the ideal of either islam or judeaism or christianity. That's why the second gulf war was necessary. To bring the conflict to a crucible and change the mindset of leadership. I'm fascinated with the stories I see coming out of finatical islamic countries of youth creating a society that is more and more free. Unfortunately, saudi arabia will lean only to late that the only constant in history is change. Their islamic religious police will be swept away as we install our christian ones here in america and cycles of crisis continue to swell and turn the axle of history. Many christians believe that we are in the end times, but Christ himself said that nation would rise against nation and ruler overturn rule and this was the stuff of human history, "but the end is not yet." Cycle after cycle of humans forced to a dramatic crisis..... But without conflict there is no story.
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So last week my friend amy called me and asked me to order her a new iMac G5. She got it today and I picked it up to install Tiger and get it ready to be her design station. The iMac G5 is quite possibly the greatest computer ever made. I have a 17" version and she bought a 20" version. The are the quintessicence of form and function. Computing boiled down to it's most basic elements. I think she'll be very happy with it.
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i went to the Suncoast Resort for t-dance sunday afternoon. But from all the work this weekend my back was killing me so i left early.
The suncoast resort has continued to decline in both appearance and stature in the gay community. The building needs a LOT of work and the place has just taken on an almost institutional feel. I wish they'd clear the land by georgies and rebuild it.
However, when I was there for bear weekend, I hopped between room parties and had a wonderful time. The BOCF party was wonderful. They are a great bunch of guys and i'm looking forward to their shin-dig in june... EUFURIA.
For a while now I've been pondering joining the bear group here in town, tampa bay bears. I've been to several of their meetings and it's like a gay rotary club with naked pool parties. The guys are ver interesing and I really want to try to get off my computer and out of my shell a little bit. The two main guys are larry and bill and I've met both of them in different circumstances over the past year. Barry works for the city of tampa and does porn on the side. I find that fascinating. He is good looking in a bear-y kinda way and totally fuckable. His partner bill is the social butterfly and I see him at the bear evets working the room. He's pretty hot too. Anyway, I'm going to fill out an application and join. Maybe that'll get my ass off the couch and maybe even some more business for lamphaus.
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So mom gets to edward's office and his birthday is really on monday the 23'rd. I could have sworn that it was the 19th. Lock me up. I'm a danger to myself and others.
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My best friend is also my roomate, edward. Everyone thinks we're a couple, and I guess to a certain extent we are, but we both have very different tastes sexually. He's into twinkies and I'm into bears. So our relationship is based on friendship and not sex. We just moved into a house together. Today is his birthday. I have a big housewaming\birthday party planned for saturday and he knows about it so I tried to fake him out today and not even acknowledge his birthday.
He has.to leave on a trip to JAX for two days so I told him to have a nice trip and I'd see him on saturday.
Meanwhile I have a big cholate chip cookie ordered from publix and mom's going to drop it off at his office... Hopefully in the next hour or so.
He needs a good birthday surprise.
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A newsweek story that soldiers at Guantanamo Bay had desecrated the Quoran was blamed by the White House for inciting murderous mobs in Afganistan and other muslim countries. It seems to me, the problem with a murderous mob is the murderous mob, not a news magazine practicing free speech on the other side of the world or a soldier.. again, with a right to free speech, interrogating a possible terrorist. There was an incident recently where my boss insulted my religion, but you don't see me holding a bible and walking down central avenue demanding his death.... but that's mostly because I have a cushy job and i want to keep it.... but you get my point... maybe it's just me.
So this is my attempt at blogging. We'll see how it works out. My name is tom and I'm a 30-something living in St. Petersburg Florida. I consider myself gay as I am not attracted to woman in almost any way. I don't particularly care for children, either... Although I have nothing against the well-behaved ones. I have absolutely no patience with people who do not understand how to use the technology they own and with people who do not keep their software up-to-date... Especially when those updates are free. Current iTunes purchases are the new aaron carter song, Saturday Night, COMEBACK by josh rouse FEEL GOOD, the new Gorillaz track, and come classic Cher - LET THIS BE A LESSON TO YA. If you don't know what iTunes is, read no further and go to some other Luddite blog, because you don't belong here. More later.
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